Success Tips Newsletter

In this issue: Tit-for-tat aka reciprocity; it makes the world go round

Word Count: 876

Time to Read: 2-3 minutes

by Eric Albertson

A good trade

“Tit for tat” is also known as reciprocity. I give you something, and you give me something back. A willing mutual exchange.

A key to getting ahead at all levels

Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People and Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich, both rely on the power of reciprocity in their advice on how to get ahead.

Good question

This is for a very good reason: tit-for-tat (or reciprocity) works. So why is it so infrequently used?

Rinse and repeat

Who knows why tit-for-tat isn’t used as often as it could be. The key is for you to remember it and use it whenever you feel it is appropriate. For most of us, reciprocity may be reasonably used practically every day. Like shampoo.

Tit for tat example: Bob Hanley (http://bobhanley.com/) is an outstanding ACT! consultant who can help almost anyone get more done in less time. He has the patience of Job. Bob wanted five minutes out of my very busy schedule. After a couple of call attempts, he sent me a greeting card with a $10 Starbucks card. I called him back the next day.

Makes the world go around

Human beings have survived through all time by playing tit-for-tat with each other. At some very basic level, we know that things will not go well for us if we don’t play it at some point. Some would even say that tit-for-tat is what keeps our society civil.

One of the laws of persuasion

As soon as someone does something for us that seems even remotely reasonable, we are on the hook. If they keep doing nice things, sooner or later, most of us must respond. Maybe this is why Robert Cialdini covers it in his wonderful book on persuasion: Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion

Like gravity, it applies to everyone

If the tit-for-tat is done reasonably, responsibly, and with some grace, you can connect with almost anyone, get along with almost anyone, and sell almost anyone. If done well, everyone smiles the whole way.

Tit for tat example: Tom Lambert from a large and rapidly growing janitorial services company named Service Point (http://www.srvcpoint.com), has his telemarketers call their target market to do a “green maintenance” survey, with the offer to trade the survey result totals for taking the survey.

The relevance hook

The trick is to be relevant. In the example above, Tom Lambert knows that being “green” is rapidly becoming an issue that building managers must deal with. He also knows that they will be curious about what their peers are doing. This function of surveys will work for almost anyone in any industry, if you are relevant.

Losing it in the rough

People like to have fun. Most executives who play golf don’t do as well as they would like. But, give them the latest golf book and a couple of sleeves of balls to hit into the rough, and you can connect:

Tit for tat example: A computer services company calls senior executives and offers to exchange a few sleeves of Nike golf balls and the latest golf advice book in exchange for completion of a 15-minute survey. The bulk of the targets reached directly, or through their assistants, agree to take the survey. The company that does this, does not want me to publish its name.

Dial it in and leverage it for years to come

Another trick is to get the balance right. Too much, and it seems like a bribe. Too little, and it’s easy to ignore. You have to be willing to experiment. Once you get it right, it should work for years with very little adjustment.

A little something between friends

In most of corporate America, a “gift” of $25 or less, can go unreported. Things costing $50 might be safe, while gifts costing north of $100 are likely to be seen as bribes. Who wants to teeter-totter with an elephant?

Irritating & stupid

For quite some time, people would send a remote control car, without the remote, to a target. The target was told that, to get the remote, they would have to meet with a salesperson. In my experience, this program was expensive and usually bombed. It didn’t pass the tests listed above.

Tell me more

The final key is to design the tit for tat so that it simply moves you into a place where you can get your message heard. A place in which the target says, “Tell me more,” or is otherwise willing to take part in a conversation.

Marketing currency

The tit-for-tat exchange that yields a sale is usually at the end of a series of interactions, and rarely at the beginning. In our “Marketing Fast Track Program,” we show you how to build marketing currency: information that you can use to buy the time, attention, and tit-for-tat, with a target, successfully.

Only at the baseball park

Never expect a home run; it usually happens only in baseball parks and in the movies.

Are you ready to go pro?

Are you ready to find out how anyone, in any business, can systematically get more business in 2008 and beyond? Sign up, today, for the next Marketing Fast Track Program, which starts on January 7^th. Learn how to boost your pay check in 2008.

Have a great Thanksgiving,

Eric